BILL Clinton "will definitely not resign," Vice President Al Gore said this week. ''He is more likely to be hit by a meteor than he is to make a decision to resign.'' On catching falling stars
This is faint reassurance. A list of things more likely than the president's being hit by a meteor has already happened this year. For all I know, a piece of astronomical flotsam will strike Bubbah silly before you read this.
For example, who imagined Hawaii hotel room rates would fall? Didn't you think it was more likely for Richard Kelley to be slapped upside his head by an opakapaka than for tourists to get a price break?
Same goes for gasoline prices. After all, there's a war on in the Gulf and Lincoln and Cadillac are vying with Lexus and Mercedes to see who can build the biggest, least fuel-efficient sports utility vehicles. Yet, my local Tesoro station is pumping regular for $1.49 a gallon -- and here we thought it was more likely for Chevron to be tagged with a subpoena than for gas prices to fall.
Worse, the city could take away the home-owner property tax exemption -- and yet we assumed that before that happened Jeremy Harris would be abducted by Klingons.
The polls said Linda Lingle was a shoo-in, a lock, a dead-solid cinch. Folks were maneuvering for cabinet appointments. Then, of course, she was hit by a meteor. At least these celestial phenomena are nonpartisan.
John Flanagan is editor and publisher of the Star-Bulletin.
To reach him call 525-8612, fax to 523-8509, send
e-mail to publisher@starbulletin.com or write to
P.O. Box 3080, Honolulu, Hawaii 96802.